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Love Thyself!

Many societal myths still surround masturbation or “self love” as we call it here at Positive Passions.  In our society we are often raised with a lot of misinformation about manually stimulating ourselves.   The fact is you will not go blind, your genitals will not fall off, you will not be punished and you will not harm yourself or get disease from solo sex.  Self love is a freedom of sexual expression and an enjoyable, safe way to get to know what type of sensations feel good to you!

Why Self Love is So Great!

·         First of all, it feels wonderful and brings us pleasure!

·         It is a safe way to have sex without the fear of STIs (sexually transmitted infections) or unplanned pregnancy. 

·         It is extremely relaxing, relieves stress, tension and menstrual cramps.

·         Masturbating to orgasm can also increase blood flow to the pelvic muscles which can help fight off yeast infections, and exercise and flush out the prostate gland which can reduce the risk of prostate infections.

·          It’s educative because you learn about your anatomy, develop increased awareness of your body and discover what type of stimulation feels good for you. 

·         You learn that you are capable of experiencing a variety of sexual pleasures and you are free to explore and discover at your own pace, without feeling pressure to meet other’s perceived expectations.

·         It can boost self confidence in and out of the bedroom, as well as improve self esteem! 

·         If all of those above reasons don’t convince you to enjoy a little self love, know that it is also a great cardiovascular workout and burns calories!

 Many sex therapists and doctors often prescribe masturbation to help increase sexual awareness or break through sexual barriers.  Women who have never experienced orgasm are encouraged to masturbate regularly, and men are encouraged to masturbate to learn to control premature ejaculation.  Let’s face it, you know better than anyone what turns you on and what feels pleasurable to you. (If you don’t, it’s time to learn!) When you know what turns you on you can gain more confidence sexually.  Self love helps us learn more about our sexual selves.  By learning what turns you on you can enhance partner sex because when you share your turn-ons with your partner, you not only connect with them intimately, but you are also able to have more relaxed, pleasure-focused sex.  

Self Love is Sex!

Many people are under the mistaken impression that only penetration equals sex and therefore have the idea that sex is only partner-based. You don’t need a partner to have sex.  Sex comes in many forms including going solo.  Don’t cheat yourself out of a fulfilling, satisfying sexual experience just because your partner is not around or you don’t have one.   Whether you are partnered up or not, masturbation should be a part of your sexual routine. Watching your partner masturbate, having them watch you or masturbating together can be a very arousing, opening and sexy experience.

Sex Toys are our friends.

Adding toys to your self love routine can be a mind-blowing experience for anyone!  Using a toy alone can help make you feel more comfortable and confident to use it with a partner.  Multi-speed toys (toys with gradual increasing speed or low, medium and high buttons) are ideal for helping you discover which strength of vibration you enjoy. The Lelo brand toys such as the Lily, Nea, Gigi and Ina are small, attractive, quiet, and all feature multiple vibration speeds and pulsing rhythms.  Many women love having two or more areas stimulated at the same time.  Multi-function toys like the rabbit, the pearl butterfly, or the total ecstasy can take you to new heights of pleasure!

So why not have a sexual date with yourself - light a candle, have a bath, take yourself for dinner, do whatever you do to feel relaxed, happy, sexy and desirable.  I just bet you will want to end the evening  with a little solo sex!

By Crystal Wiens


Adrian says

"I agree masturbation is an important aspect of sexuality. Getting to know what your sexual triggers are and what feels amazing for you is important because then you can work with your partner in increasing each others sexual fulfillment as you both know what you like and have a better understanding of your body. Great article :)"
posted on: August 25, 2011 11:17 AM

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